The world we live in is an interesting place as are a different personality and Habits. The disadvantage of this is that inevitably there will be certain personalities that will irritate us or feel disgusted. And these people who are annoying to us are around, very often they are those with whom we have to work.
One of the truths of life is that you will meet people who irritate and annoy you. Whether at work, at home, at school or in social situations, you will meet people whose behavior makes you grind your teeth in frustration. How you respond to that type of person could determine your success in a professional situation and prevent conflicts in your family life.
10 Stop Complaining
The complaint habits only serves to make us feel bad. The more we complain, the more we focus our attention on the negative aspects that displease us, ignoring those positive aspects. We amplify our discomfort and also, the complaint has a slight addictive component. The more we complain, the more we need to complain again and again about the same subject. We enter a negative loop that only leads us to feel worse. If we think of someone in our environment who complains continually – it will be easy to realize that this person usually accommodates himself in a victim position and that he does not solve problems, he only complains again and again.
The continuous complaint takes us away from others. People who complain continually often resort to their friends, family, and colleagues to vent and dump them on the negativity of their complaints. Initially, people in their environment listen to them, support them, help them find solutions… But in the long run, people get tired of always listening to negative messages, because negativity is contagious. With the passage of time, nobody wants to be listening to complaints. So, although at first people who complain have a lot of support from others, in the long run, they are people who are left alone. The complaint also takes us away from others because when we complain about the behavior of other people, we become angrier and we avoid being with others. We become more intransigent, less tolerant of mistakes and find it harder to forgive.
The negativity that comes with the complaint habits spreads to others and generates a bad atmosphere. Something very characteristic of work environments. When a person begins to complain continually about different aspects of their work, it infects that negativity to the rest and the work environment becomes cloudy, so that in a short time, a whole team can be having a bad time because they have entered the negative loop of the complaint. If we complain continuously, our children will learn it. They will grow up with a negative view of the world around them and that will cause them unhappiness.
We are committed to changing our attitude towards daily life and we realize how many times we complain; the change is quite immediate. “The simple act of becoming aware helps us complain significantly less.” The best thing about the change is that the whole process hardly lasts a month. Stop complaining and start living better is the question of days because, the first effect of the decrease in complaints is that we gain the energy that we steal and we can use it, among other things, to change what we do not like.
09Stop Judging Others
It is not uncommon to judge others knowing little about them. Although we do not like to be judged incorrectly, it is usual to judge other people all the time. We judge and judge constantly, even many times without realizing the wrong we do. The unfortunate that we spend so much time judging others, that many times we do not invest the necessary time in looking at ourselves and recognizing our own limitations.
Many times, we get carried away by what external appearances tell us and other times we get carried away by thoughts. It is important that we stop for a few seconds and analyze the situation well. If we are going to judge someone, let it be with all the questionnaires on the table. Try to be more tolerable with peoples. You may not approve of something someone has done, but unless it is something horrible, live and let live. Everyone is wrong, it is not good to judge others because you think you would do otherwise.
Not everyone is the same. Everybody is different and should get respect. The culture, the family, the friends, the education we receive, everyone has a different story. Although you don’t like something is not to mean it’s wrong. We are equal to the difference, we must respect each other and try to help us. Being a person with an open and tolerant mind says a lot about you. Showing a positive attitude towards others makes communication much easier. Also, I’m sure you’ll meet interesting people if you’re tolerant and broad-minded.
To think badly or to think about someone, for good or for bad, without knowing absolutely nothing about him, without knowing him, without giving him only one chance, is wrong. You have to take the time to get to know people well before making judgments about them. Nobody likes to be judged incorrectly. If you do not like them doing it to you, can’t it to others. It is the golden rule and we should all respect it. Think of times when someone could have hurt you for having prejudged you. Are you going to do the same with other people
08Shame About Yourself
We’ve all felt that way at some point, have not we? Maybe you feel that life has played you a bad hand. Maybe you have lost money, a loved one or health. You may even feel that you have lost many opportunities that others have easily won, therefore, you are convinced that fate has been really unfair to you.
And although sometimes your feelings may be fully justified, you must stop feeling sorry for yourself. It is a totally self-destructive attitude that will not contribute to the situation improving or the problem being solved. Interpreting the victim role will only help you immerse yourself in a state of apathy that will further deepen your pain and helplessness. You will become the kind of person to whom things happen, but who cannot do anything about it. Stop feeling sorry for yourself will allow you to rise above the circumstance, see it from another perspective and do something about it.
If you want to connect with a state of well-being and harmony, if you want happiness to be part of your life, you should stop feeling sorry for yourself. Only then will you allow the solution to come to you, because you will be attracting it with your energies, with your thoughts, and with your actions.
Acting and feeling like a victim will not allow you to transform that mediocre existence that you say you have, into one full of abundance, harmony, and well-being. How will you connect with the power of intention, with the creative force of the Universe if your thoughts, which are responsible for making your intention manifest, are focused on all the “bad” that has happened to you so far and what do you hate?
If you continue to think that the cause of your problems is outside, that any person, thing or circumstance is the cause of your suffering, you will be missing out on a great opportunity to change your reality and become a wonderful being, full of joy and happiness
07Stop Being Self Centered
Selfishness habits is a more or less usual behavior of people, but that does not mean that you cannot adopt behaviors to be more aware of how we behave with others, to improve the quality and quantity of our relationships. And is that selfishness breaks relationships cause suffering and can lead to an intense feeling of discomfort. To avoid this, you should examine your selfish actions and how they affect the people around you. Now, when he regrets being selfish, guilt can take over him. Then it is necessary to accept this behavior and to recognize this attitude is not beneficial for either party.
Once you recognize that you are being selfish, you need to change your perspective, and this may require effort and determination. Changing perspective means assuming that you are not always going to be right and that the opinions of others also count. Once you understand this, you can start to offer something to others and not just think about receiving all the time.
Remember that when we give to other people, we will feel better, because helping others is also beneficial for the one who helps and not only for the one who receives it. Selfishness, self-contentedness, and selfishness are the same for many people, but in reality, they are not. For example, you can be selfish without being egotistical. Now, these concepts often go hand in hand. The egoist wants everything for himself, it is a behavior and an attitude. However, while egomania is that one loves oneself very much. Egocentricity is that people think that the center of the universe and that the opinions of others are below theirs.
Although these concepts do not always appear together, in many cases, people who think so much of themselves do not take others into account or think about their needs. The result is that they are also selfish. Putting aside this way of thinking can help stop being selfish. Many times, we act negatively towards others because we think they want to hurt us or because we are victims of prejudice, and we do not stop to think about this. Being empathetic is understanding others, and therefore, feeling open to their feelings and emotions.
When you understand the feelings of others and their needs, then you can open your heart and offer them something. Human beings need to surround ourselves with other people to feel happy. Therefore, anticipate the needs of others and show them that you care. Sure, will thank you.
It is not always easy to act in a compassionate and altruistic way, because selfishness has a lot to do with how we have been educated and the society in which we live, which encourages this type of practice.
Human beings want immediate pleasure, and this often means that we do not take into account others and the consequences of our behavior. That is why it is necessary to do your part because the will is key when it comes to being compassionate and friendly. Better that people remember you as a better person than as someone selfish.
06Stop Trying To Control Others
Your fear masks your lack of ability to trust others, does it sound familiar? Maybe it’s true or not, but it’s hard for you to trust in the work that other people will do, and on which the final result in which you will participate depends in part. And trying to do it would be a mistake, you should practice being more flexible, tolerant and empathetic, allowing people and even the universe to do things their own way.
The moral, do well, everything that depends on you but does not expect to control everything, all the time, you do not need it and it is also very exhausting. You can trust, without being credulous, in other people, and in their resolution abilities, finally, you cannot do everything yourself. And if it’s about accidents or similar issues, much less to do. This is very common among parents when they see that their children are making mistakes of adolescence and youth. It is as if they wanted to avoid falls and learning, but this is carried out, it is sick for both sides.
If you really want to stop controlling habits in everything, start from home and your recurring sites, whether with your parents, children, siblings, partner, friends, and colleagues. Stop wanting to control everything, because that attitude brings you problems with those around you. There are thousands of recreational activities and personal interests that you could focus your efforts on, instead of wanting to control others.
However, our existence does have a purpose, but it is not to control everything but to know what things are within your field of action and to take responsibility for them. You can control everything that depends directly on you, such as your mood, your tastes, what to eat, your physical condition, your work, your partner, your fun, your favorite activities, relax, be happy, have family, friends, study something new, etc.
05Stop Being Stubborn
A stubborn is not a person with a strong character as it is usually defined. They are individuals with an iron mind, but supported by rigid thoughts. Due to their egocentric attitude, they find it difficult to listen and to talk as they do not admit that anyone can question their criteria. Therefore, when someone wants to indicate another way of seeing things, they are very susceptible and even irritated. A stubborn man recognizes his limits, but he does not like it when nobody comes to remind them. For that reason, he feels very vulnerable and believes that at any moment he can be pointed out by his neighbor so that they argue at the minimum before the other has opened his mouth. If you are your partner, you will often find yourself wondering, how will you get up today?
Communication with a stubborn is a difficult task. Why? Because he’s always right, according to him, of course. Given the expression, what do you prefer to be right or be happy? A big head does not hesitate. Of course, being right is the ultimate happiness! Did you have any doubt? He will always ask for compelling reasons to convince him and change his criteria, but that is an impossible task because he is not willing to change his mind.
Break your order. Maintaining a schedule or schedules rigidly despite the circumstances is a stress factor. If you want to preserve physical and mental health, it is necessary to accept a bit of disorder and chaos. Break some of your rules from time to time. Write a diary Putting your reflections on paper will help you feel more relieved and once you have succeeded, try to find the source of your stubbornness. This will not justify you, but it will give you a new perspective.
Stubbornness is based on obsession and the desire for external validation, the need to be right. Tension is the intrinsic desire to achieve a purpose and do it in harmony with oneself and others, although it involves considerable effort at times. And what do you choose to be right or be happy?
04Control Your Overconfidence
The excess of confidence causes that the people and groups lose opportunities and do not fulfill the objectives that are proposed, so you must act with a lot of diligence, make a complete analysis of all the variables involved in a project, plan and have an effective follow-up of each one of the activities.
It has been observed over-confidence in companies that lost leadership, disasters at work, people who squandered large fortunes, sports teams that were eliminated, opportunities that were diluted by carelessness, etcetera. In many of those cases, there was no time to react favorably, for that reason, you should be aware of the first signs that something is wrong and make the corresponding corrections.
In personal goals it is quite common to overconfidence, for example, a person has already lost considerable weight and little by little returns to negative habits and returns to the starting point. There is also the case of people who are already having good results with their business and then they start to neglect it, to the point where they lose customers. Whatever goal you are working on requires perseverance, then it raises the level of self-demand and when you observe that everything is on a good track, press even more, until you consolidate the change you want.
03Stop Living A Double Life
Living in appearance sometimes is not an easy task. On the road sometimes, desire faces reality. That is, what we would like to achieve at certain moments is materially impossible in the daily routine. This happens in the plane of love and also in the workplace. Perhaps for this reason, we must learn to enjoy reality and limit the field of ideality, where with imagination, we can recreate a fantasy world that has little or nothing to do with concrete life. The truth is that although living is not an easy task, there are people who complicate their lives when they adopt have double life. That is, when they assume, they want to live in appearance, hiding something, with the effort of will that involves living in this way. Especially, when a double life is prolonged over the years. It is something that can anguish.
There are many cases of people who have a double life in many different ways. The workplace can also happen that someone is going through a very difficult economic time and still want to pretend wealth and comfort before others. Even, to the closest. There are also cases of homosexuals who, even so, decide to marry in the face of social pressure that continues to exist, especially in small towns and very conservative places. The double life ultimately refers to the concealment of some area of our life, even with those people with whom there is enough confidence to live naturally and be able to share the present in different areas, that is, with the family, the couple or the friends.
There are also parents who are apparently exemplary, couples who seem exemplary until one day, by surprise, divorce occurs. The consequences of having a double life are suffering. The suffering even at the cost of some moments of pleasure or joy. The truth is that the scales weigh more lie, suffering and the tragedy of living half.
02Avoid Talking Too Much
People who talk a lot usually argue a lot. To make you it is unattractive. If someone wants to argue with you, simply Accept and Amplify them, or ignore them. There are people who will not talk to you unless you provoke them. Start the talk and let them follow them. Think before you speak and be clear when you give an opinion. Learn to filter useless words and themes. You’ll be surprised how many stupid things you can say when you talk a lot.
Nobody cares a shit, not your stuff, not your feelings, not your drama, nothing. It was a hard pill to swallow, but I ended up accepting it. People react well when the subject they talk about is positive. Even those who gossip with you or those who tell you that it’s okay to discuss your problems with them will think less about you when you talk about negative things. Do you want to be remembered as that negative type or as a positive one? I am pretty sure that everyone wants to be that person with whom others want to get together and have a good time. Be positive!
If you say something funny, do not repeat the joke 100 times. I disagree once and let others repeat it. Do not repeat the same talk 20 times a day. If you like to talk about cars, mention one or at most twice a day. The more you mention the same, the more boring you become. Do not talk about R.A.P.E. (Religion, Abortion, Politics, Exes). People who talk a lot usually mention the above a lot. Do not talk about these things. Do not give controversial opinions such as death to women, death to gays, etc. Law 38 (think how you want but behave like others).
Finally, do not be gossip or speak badly of others. You’ll think you’re making the other guy or dude look bad. But the only thing you do is make it look good. Demonstrate that you are the prize and do not give relevance to others. And believe me that others are going to talk shit about you all the time, if someone comes and tells you that x told you stupid, just laugh and answer “good”.
01Avoid Giving Advice To People
People are all in different points of our lives, neither better nor worse, neither good nor bad. Different There are people who learn in certain areas while others have advanced topics. So, if this is so: what is the meaning of giving advice to someone who is at a point other than mine and who therefore sees life with other eyes than I see it? What is the purpose of giving advice without first asking if the person wants to be taught or even more if he is able to understand what we are going to tell him?
Something similar happens with our advice. We can tell others not to eat industrialized foods because it carries the risk of increasing the chances of getting sick. We can even propose a series of alternatives that we consider valid. But if they look for flavor in food over health, what can we do? You have to be in their shoes to understand why they do it and from there, adapt our conversation to be respectful and warm. Otherwise, we could easily enter into an infertile discussion or that what we say goes unnoticed. Because in that way we do not get involved with the desire that others change and therefore we do not lose the peace.
People who do not advise seem happier, calmer and connected with others because they understand and understand what they need, what makes them feel good. I know several such beings and I find it admirable to see how they flow with others, how they are linked from the issues that bring them closer and not from those that can create conflict. They are able to create that atmosphere of warmth where the participant feels at ease, without the fear of being judged for thinking in such and such a way. The invitation then is to observe whether avoiding giving advice increases our peace or not. If it does not, we can discard it. But if it does, how good to incorporate it, right?